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to the Pagan Lightbulb Jokepage. These are meant in fun, so don't take offense. Just read and enjoy!

How many Dianics does it take to change a lightbulb?

One! And it's not funny!

How many Druids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

They don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in stone circles.
or...
13. One to hold the lightbulb and twelve to drink until the room spins.

How many Shamans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

They don't, they screw in the woods.

How many Family Traditionalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Candlelight was good enough for our ancesters, it's good enough for us!

How many Brit Trad Witches does it take to change a lightbulb?

13. One to change the bulb and 12 to mourn the passing of the old bulb.

How many Gardnarians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Why do you wish to know... initiate?
or...
It's a third initiate secret.

How many Alexandrains does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just a minute, I'll look it up in my Gardnarian Book of Shadows.

How many solitary witches does it take to change a lightbulb?

drumming fingers on desk... Um...ONE?

How many Starhawk witches does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

(Plaintively) There are starving villages in Africa that doesn't even have lightbulbs...

How many kitchen witches does it take to change a lightbulb?

Already changed!

How many Frost 'School of Wicca' witches does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just You! That's right, YOU! And for only $195 we'll send you our complete "Witches Magic of Lightbulb Changing Course'™ with real knowledge that you can apply to ANY lightbulb ANY where! Listen to the testimony of a young couple from Wisconsin who...

How many Discordians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Five Tones.

How many Buckland witches does it take to change a lightbulb?

Refer to his second book, 'Practical Lightbulb Changing' by Raymond Buckland...

How many witches does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they do it in Great Rites.

How many Sex Magicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

They don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw on the altar.

How many Santarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Five. One to screw in the lightbulb and four to hold the goat down.

How many New-Agers doews it take to change a lightbulb?

We don't use lightbulbs, we just think happy thoughts into our crystals until they glow.

How many Golden Dawners does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to hold the ladder, one to hold the bulb, three to decipher the Light Bulb Ritual from the Secret Chefs™, One to publish it, and one to sue all the others.

And now for the Zodiac!

How many Aries does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one, but it takes a heck of alot of bulbs.
or...
Only one. You want to make something of it?

How many Taurus does it take to change a lightbulb?

What? Me move?
or...
One. But just try to convince them the burned out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.

How many Gemini does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. But the job never gets done. They just keep arguing about who is suppose to do it and how it's suppose to get done.

How many Cancers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one, but he has to bring his mother.
or...
Just one, but it takes a therapist 3 years to help them through the grief process.

How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?

A dozen. One to change the bulb and 11 to applaud.
or...
Leos don't change lightbulbs, although sometimes thier agent will get a Virgo to do the job for them while they're out.

How many Virgos does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to clean out the socket, one to dust the bulb, one to install the bulb, and two engineers to check the work.

How many Libras does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. Or maybe one. No, on second thought make that two. Is that alright with you?

How many Scorpios does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They like the dark.
or...
That secret information can only be shared with the Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierachial Order.
or...
Lightbulbs? Now there's an idea!

How many Sagittarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to install the bulb, and a Virgo to pick up the pieces.
or...
The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out lightbulb?

How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?

The lights fine as it is.
or...
I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.

How many Aquarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Have you asked the bulb if it wants to be changed?
or...
Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so...

How many Pisceans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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